Sean B. Fitzgerald It doesn’t go something like this, it goes exactly like this.

Headlines

Perfect life continues, Tiger Woods wins another tournament
Supermodel wife: Check. Endless talent and determination: Check. Closing in on a billion dollars in earnings: Check. Dog who poses for cameras and stares into your soul: Check. Yesterday, Tiger Woods added to his career winnings by coming from behind to beat Jim Furyk and the rest of the field in the The Memorial. That makes 67 career wins on the PGA Tour. How long until its called the Tiger Woods Tour? Because I am almost certain that Woods earns more money than the PGA itself. Hell, that dog probably earns more. Look at it, it's starting to creep me out. Moving on.

Lakers win in OT over Magic, take 2-0 series lead
Least. Interesting. Series. Ever. Well, if Courtney Lee doesn't miss that point-blank range lay-up at the end of regulation last night there would have been some interest. Rookies. I blame the mask. Nonetheless, he did not put the biscuit in the basket and the Magic find themselves in more or less a must-win situation in Game 3. I remember when I was a kid and the 2009 NBA Playoffs started. Players like Dwyane Wade and Joe Johnson were in it. Those were the days. Wake me up when it's over.

Vikings give Favre deadlines to decide whether he will play in 2009
My indifference is suffocating me! Help! Someone give me something to care about!...Sweet, a video of a cat on a toilet. Thanks.

I'll be back.